Red Flags of Love Fraud – 10 Signs You’re Dating a Sociopath
This book reveals, for the first time, the tactics of social predators who pursue romantic relationships not for love, but for exploitation. Readers learn how sociopaths seduce their targets, why it’s hard to escape the relationships, and how to protect themselves.
Chapter 5: Sociopathic Seduction
Sociopaths engage in calculated seduction. When sociopaths overwhelm you with attention and affection, they are not sharing the spontaneous outpouring of love in their hearts. They are employing premeditated tactics designed to achieve their objectives of power, control and sex.
The first step of seduction, of course, is to make themselves appealing to you. The Lovefraud Romantic Partner Survey asked what respondents found enticing, intriguing or captivating in the beginning of their involvements with the sociopaths. Respondents were free to write anything they wanted, and their answers were analyzed for common threads.
The five most prominent themes were:
Made me feel special – 27 percent
The top response wasn’t a trait of the sociopaths it was how the targets reacted to all the attention they received. Sociopaths piled on affection and expressed their love, which made the survey respondents feel great.
Energy – 26 percent
The sociopaths radiated a high-spirited energy, an exuberance, a magnetism. Respondents described it as confidence, intelligence, intensity, competence and stability.
Physical appearance – 24 percent
Sociopaths look just like the rest of us—some are ordinary, and others are hot. Physical appearance, of course, is a big part of any romantic attraction. Survey respondents described the sociopaths they were involved with as beautiful, handsome, gorgeous and cute.
Charming – 23 percent
Sociopaths have a way with words. Survey respondents reacted to their charm, charisma, conversational skills, and their seemingly natural ability to always say the right thing.
Personality – 18 percent
Respondents described the sociopaths as pleasant, fun and exciting.
In addition to these themes, 12 percent of survey respondents said that the sociopaths were honest, had good character or shared their values. At least, they appeared that way. Another 11 percent mentioned sexual attraction, and 7 percent said they had similar interests. Four percent of respondents said the sociopaths seemed to be their soul mates, and 3 percent were drawn in by the pity play.